Ramen King Noodle House
by Elle-Procrastinator
Summary: It's Sabo's birthday, and so he, Ace and Luffy go out to celebrate. At the Ramen King Noodle House.  ONESHOT


**Ramen King Noodle House**

The waitress of Ramen King Noodle House could only stare at the tall, mysterious man dressed in a shaded, shoddy coat and top hat that covered half of his face. She watched as he first swayed to the left, then to the right, before righting himself.

She swallowed nervously. "Err… Can I help you, sir?"

The unnamed man coughed, as if clearing his throat. "Uh, yes. We – I mean, _I_ would like a private room, please. Money is no object," he added, holding up a shining piece of gold to emphasize his point. The girl could already imagine her boss' beli eyes, staring greedily at the gold pence, and managed a weak smile. Well, if he had money, then…

"Right this way, please." She led the man to their most private room, opening the door and letting him in. She watched as he sat down in the only chair in the grand room, his back to her, tapping his gold coin on the wide table idly. "What would you like to order, sir?" she asked nervously, fidgeting a little.

"Well," the man started, voice gruff, "for starters, we – I mean, _I_, would like ten bowls of yakisoba ramen, ten meat platters, and ten more ramen. Oh, and meat!" the last part was said in a rather high voice – in contrast to his earlier tone – and seemed to come from somewhere _other_ than the man's mouth, but then he made a sound halfway between a wheeze and a cough, and his normal voice returned. "I mean, lots of meat. Now get to it!"

With a start, the confused and intimidated waitress squeaked out a 'yes, sir!' and closed the door behind her, before hurrying down the stairs.

A few moments later, the mysterious man's stomach talked – literally. "…Is she gone?"

"Yeah, is she?" his – err, _nether regions_ asked.

"Yes." Came the short reply. Then, Portgas D. Ace scowled, adjusting his – well, actually Sabo's – top hat slightly. "Luffy!" he hissed to his feet, "What did I say? No talking until after the waitress is gone! 'Oh, and meat!'" he mocked, mimicking his younger brother perfectly.

There was a muffled sound, where Ace reached down and punched the younger boy on the side of his head. "Gomen'nasai," Monkey D. Luffy muttered, but ruined the not-so-sincere apology by chuckling after. "The waitress didn't suspect a thing, huh, Sabo!"

Ace's stomach moved in an up and down movement. "I know," Sabo snickered, "don't you think so, Ace?"

Ace smirked. Well, he couldn't deny that his acting skills _were_ perfect. "Yeah," he agreed, "but Luffy, next time, stop swaying so much!"

"It's not my fault you guys are heavy," Luffy whined. Sabo laughed.

Then, a knock resounded at the door. "Get ready!" Ace hissed, before clearing his throat. "Come in," he said in a deeper voice.

The waitress from earlier entered the room, carrying a tray with a few bowls of steaming ramen stacked upon one another. She pasted a nervous smile on her face and shuffled to the side, placing the tray down quickly. "The rest will be up shortly, sir."

The mystery man grunted, and the waitress exited the room.

Once she was gone, Luffy unbuttoned the coat from the bottom up, showcasing his grinning face. "Ooh, this looks good," he practically drooled. Suddenly, a rubber arm stretched itself towards a bowl of ramen, only to be slapped back by Ace's hand. The straw-hat-wearing boy pouted.

"Wait a second, Luffy," Ace scolded, "Sabo gets the first bowl."

"Oh, right!" Luffy gave a sheepish grin, flashing his teeth. "You first, Sabo! Happy birthday!" he added.

Ace grunted, "Yeah, happy birthday."

Sabo grinned, and his missing tooth came into view for a moment. "Thanks, guys!" then, he promptly grabbed hold of a bowl and dug in. Shortly after, Ace and Luffy lost what little patience they had and followed, slurping at the noodles and gulping down the hot, hot soup.

* * *

><p>"More!" three voices chorused a while later, piles upon piles of ramen bowls and meat platters scattered all over the table.<p>

The waitress downstairs heard the cry, hastily grabbing hold of the tray the cook had just handed her. They locked eyes – and she noted that the older man was sweating profusely, trying to keep up with the customer's massive orders. She herself felt frazzled and lightheaded, and with a small squeak, began her tedious trek up the stairs.

Up, down, up, down.

The process continued, and upstairs, in the private room, six hands grabbed at bowls and plates greedily, not bothering to use the proper eating utensils.

The waitress entered the room, panting slightly, holding another tray. She blinked when two hands stretched – _stretched!_ – towards her, and took hold of the ramen in her arms. She gaped, open mouthed. Had he…?

She quickly ran downstairs to fetch the cook.

* * *

><p>"So… good!" Luffy praised between mouthfuls, inhaling two bowls of ramen and a platter of meat in mere seconds. "Best… your birthday… ever!"<p>

Sabo wholeheartedly agreed, his bulging cheeks filled with food.

"_What in the world…_?" both cook and waitress gaped in disbelief at the three boys that had replaced the mysterious man, with one hooking a finger in his mouth to stretch – _stretch!_ – his jaw, effectively creating a bigger crevice to place the food in at an alarmingly fast rate.

Almost like… a black hole.

At the sound of the cook's furious voice, Ace, Sabo and Luffy froze, mouths still full of noodles. Their eyes went wide, each thinking the same thing.

_Busted._

"Well, thanks for the free food, old man!" Ace said heartily, recovering fast and jumping out of his disguise.

"Yeah, this was the best birthday lunch I've ever had!" Sabo added, placing his top hat back on his head of hair.

"Mrphhagr!" Luffy tried to say, over a mouthful of meat.

Laughing uproariously, Ace and Sabo ran for the window, Ace holding on to a fistful of Luffy's shirt. They jumped out the window with a great big _crash! _before the cook finally came to his senses, running after them.

Then, a hand suddenly stretched – _stretched!_ – towards him, and he only had time to widen his eyes and duck as the rubber boy grabbed another bowl of ramen, before disappearing from view.

Recovering quickly, the man leaned over the window and bellowed, "Thieves! Get them! Thieves!"

Still laughing, the trio of brothers dashed madly down the street, weaving through nobles and commoners alike. They kept running, with Luffy occasionally reaching out to grab food from food stands, until they reached the giant gate. They stopped to catch their breath, grinning goofily at each other.

Brandishing his pointer finger, Sabo said, "This is the best birthday, ever!"

Luffy laughed happily, and Ace smirked.

The rest of the way back to Dadan's, the three boys – _brothers_ – laughed and smiled and joked around, taking out a couple alligators along the way.

As the sun began to set, Sabo smiled slightly to himself, regarding his two brothers with a grin. Ace had Luffy in a headlock; punishment because the younger boy had tried to eat the remaining ramen bowl in secret. But, since it was Luffy, the slurping gave him away immediately.

Sabo put his arms around both Ace and Luffy, effectively breaking up the struggle. "You guys are the best!" he declared heartily.

_Definitely the best birthday, ever._

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Hope you liked it! Please tell me what you thought! Happy birthday Sabo! *sniffle* Wish you were still alive!

Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece, though if I did, Sabo and Ace wouldn't've died, oh no.


End file.
